One Minute at a Time, Sweet Jesus…

Do any of you know that Gospel song that goes, “One day at a time, Sweet Jesus, that’s all I ask of you…” ? It was very popular where I was growing up in Eastern Kentucky. I know the melody of the song, but that line is the only lyrics I remember. I tend to sing it in my head when I’m feeling overwhelmed. 

 

Right now, where we are in our craziness, I’ve had to change the words to “ One Minute at a time, Sweet Jesus…” Cause, one day is just too much to have to think about. I’m down to one minute increments. 

 

There’s a meme I love: 

adulthood

I am so guilty of this. I’m just waiting for things to slow down a bit…As soon as things calm down a bit… I’m just waiting for this crazy period to be over…

 

I mentioned this to my husband a month ago and he looked at me in disbelief. “Sweetie, this is life. This, what we have right now. It’s never going to slow down. It’s just going to get worse.” 

 

I, of course, didn’t want to hear that. I’m still hanging on to that hope. So far, I have been wrong and my husband has been right. But still, just give it another couple weeks, right? 

 

When I was younger I used to wish that I knew the future. If only I knew… Sometimes I wished that God would send a prophet to me who would give me a very detailed accounting of what my future held. 

 

Yeah. 

 

I don’t think that way anymore. 

 

Now, I know that God doesn’t tell me the future, because if he did, I would have run away in sheer terror. I would have seen the huge load that I am carrying now and figured that there was no way I could do something like that. And, in a sense, I would have been right. Esther from twenty years ago could not have handled what Esther in the present is doing. But, Esther from twenty years ago, also didn’t have that twenty years of growth and strengthening. 

 

There’s a reason we can’t see the future. 

 

Right now, even the future of several hours is overwhelming me. How do I get all this stuff done today? I find that if I start looking forward, even a couple hours, my anxiety levels rise. But, if I can stay in the moment, I’m ok. Right now, all I need to do is sit here with my children while they go to sleep and write my blog. That’s as far as I’m going to think. I can handle that task. After this task I will tackle the next one. One moment at a time. There are a bunch of internet quotes out there about how Tomorrow doesn’t exist, we only have the present. While I hold to the idea that Jesus holds all time in his hands, the Bible has a lot to say about worrying about tomorrow and how pointless that is. Jesus said: 

 

“So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34

 

We are called to stay present. In-the-moment. Don’t worry. Don’t be anxious. 

 

I am taking this to the next level. I’m not going to worry about this afternoon, or tonight. I’m just going to stay in the moment. One minute at a time. I only get overwhelmed when I try to look into the future. I forget that by the time I reach that Future Moment, even if it’s just half a day away, I will be a stronger person, ready to handle those challenges. I am stronger because each moment I choose to remain calm instead of panicking, each moment I choose to do the hard thing instead of the easy thing…I am strengthening my faith, I am proving to myself that Yes, I can do this, and Yes, God is faithful. 

 

And so, as life seems to speed up faster and faster and faster, I will simply take it one step, one minute at a time. 

 

Don’t Worry

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to not worry? About anything? I know the Bible tells us not to worry, and we pay lip service to that. But deep down, if you are anything like me, you have a running list of things that you can drag up at a moments notice to worry about. I’ve been reading more about the sovereignty of God. And it strikes me really hard, how foolish worry is. Either God is in control or he isn’t. If he is, then why are we worrying? If he isn’t then yes, we should definitely live our lives in fear and trembling. My reading of the Bible seems to say that actually, Yes, he is in control. So, why the heck am I worrying about everything? 

 

Does he love me or not? We sing the song “Yes Jesus love me…” and smile at our children when they sing it so sweetly. But do we believe it? If Jesus loves me, and he is God, then what on earth do I have to worry about? 

 

I think what scares me, is that we don’t have any promises in the Bible that say we are going to live a life without pain, without hardship, without trials. God doesn’t promise that. He does promise that he will be with us always, that he works all things to good, that he will never leave us or forsake us. But I worry…I don’t want trials and hardships. And I have a hard time seeing how God can be in control and love me when I am suffering. 

 

What if God is using those hardships and trials to change me? What if it’s more important to him that I grow to be more like him than that I stay in a state of constant ease and comfort? That seems very un-American. The American dream is to pursue wealth and happiness. Going through suffering that changes our character and strengthens us and makes us more like Jesus, just doesn’t seem right. Not very loving. God’s must have lost control somewhere along the way.

 

My dream is to live a life without worry. To be able to confidently say, God’s got this. He’s in control. I can trust him. He loves me. 

 

No matter what the circumstances, I want to walk in his perfect peace. 

 

Lord may it be so. 

 

Though I am secretly worried about what trials and hardships I will have to overcome before I finally get it! I guess it comes down to faith. And the Bible says that we can ask God to strengthen our faith…:”Lord I believe, help my unbelief!” 

 

I guess that’s my prayer tonight as I write this. Lord I believe. Help my unbelief!