This weekend my husband and I celebrated our 21st wedding anniversary. We kept it pretty low-key. Went out to eat one night, and then on The Day we went for an evening paddle in our canoe while my parents watched the kids.
My husband patiently held the canoe while I gingerly climbed in. I have yet to master the art of getting in and out of a canoe gracefully. I was sitting up front, he was behind me. He gave me some pointers on holding my paddle. I adjusted accordingly. We pointed out birds that we could see, fish jumping out of the water. There were many times that we were silent for so long that I half-wondered if my husband was still in the canoe. But, I could feel the tug and pull of his paddling as we sliced through the water. At one point in time, I felt him shifting around, getting a drink from the water bottle, and I was the only one paddling. Suddenly the canoe was barely moving, making it obvious to me that my paddling efforts were not really what was making us move.
We went up the lake and found a creek that we explored a bit. The water narrowing, trees over top of us.
Then the canoe started tipping back and forth and I could hear a scrabble behind me.
I finally asked, What are you doing?
I’m trying to get rid of a spider.
The canoe stopped tipping.
Another long pause.
Then he says, He’s headed your way now.
Just how big a spider are we talking about??
Fortunately no spider attacked me.
We ended our paddle peacefully.
And I think about marriage. What do I say to my kids as they approach the age of where marriage is something to think about?
I would say, marry someone that you can be silent with. Marry someone who’s willing to pull the weight of the canoe just cause they want to be with you, and they don’t care how bad you are at paddling. Marry someone whose company brings you peace and a feeling of safety and well-being.
As I write this blog and smell the Chili burning on the stove, because I forgot I was cooking. As usual. I would also add, marry someone who will eat your burnt Chili without comment.
Happy Anniversary My Love.